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Haute Coulter
From nerd boy to sex toy: The rise and thighs of a beefcake stud machine.
Dean Coulter flashes a knee-weakening grin at me as he eases into his seat, then eyes the tape recorder between us. “Are you comfortable with this set-up?” I ask him. He nods his head and launches a mighty sigh that seems to come from somewhere deep inside his body—it’s the first of dozens of sighs that Coulter will utter throughout our interview. He uses them almost as punctuation; later, while reviewing the interview tapes, I realize that Coulter, 31, sighs heavily whenever he reveals something personal about himself. When he talks about his career and the mechanics of his day-to-day life, no sighs. He toys with his coffee and gazes out the window as I get settled. “I’m tired,” he announces out of nowhere. He glances at me sideways and flashes another irresistible grin. “I’ve been pretty busy lately, and I’m just plain tired.” He’s smiling at me, though, so I can’t quite tell if he’s tired, as they say, in a good way, or not.
“Well then, talk about that,” I prompt him, thinking, as the words come out of my mouth, that I sound like a therapist. It’s not the first time I’ll feel that way over the course of our interview. “People just open up to me,” he reveals later. “They talk to me about things. And I love listening to them. I’ve been in therapy for years myself, so I’m comfortable with talking about my life. But there’s just something about me that makes people want to open up to me.”
Let’s talk about your various businesses.
When I first got into this business, I just did a little Web page on my own, this tacky little thing. And then when Robert Kirsch split from Titan—he had been doing their Web stuff—I hired him to do my site. He’s very talented, and I liked him anyway, so I hired him to redo it. I wanted something nicer, and there’s so much money out there on the Web to be made, it was something that I needed to look into. I studied computer science for a while in school. I’m kind of a technical nerd, actually. I spend my life in front of a computer.
I understand, believe me. I don’t know how you can look so good with as much time as you spend online.
It’s my job to look like this. When I was moving to L.A. this last time, I decided to take advantage of the move and think about where I really wanted to be. I came up with the design and flow of the site, and hired someone to do all of the coding and so on. I set up the webcam and a diary. It’s a pretty complex site. And a lot of work, much more than I thought. I do it all by myself. It’s a monster. Time just passes outside your window and you never even notice. I can’t keep up. I’m constantly buried in it. And the webcam—people always want to chat. It’s on 24/7. So, it is a little overwhelming. It’s my life. [Sighs]
You’re just gonna have to schedule yourself a vacation. As far as the webcam is concerned, don’t you ever just want to throw a blanket over the fucking thing?
Yeah, I do. It would be nice. It’s just…I don’t know. I’ve created a monster. I’m a slave to the Web. [Laughs] It’s not that I don’t enjoy it. I just wish I didn’t have to do it all by myself.
OK, since you’ve been complaining a lot, tell me what it is you enjoy about it.
Talking to people. Actually interacting with them. Just being able to interact with somebody. When somebody’s in a chat room, they can be whatever they want to be. Totally anonymous. They open up to you. I’ve had some very, very serious talks with my members on my site. It’s almost like I’m providing therapy. It’s kind of the same way with my clients when I escort. We get into conversations where they talk about their partners, or who they’re dating, their jobs, or where they’re at in their lives. I love listening to people talk about something other than their favorite this or their favorite that. I like being able to help people open up and talk about real things, emotions. This guy, he’d been in a relationship for twelve years, and he wasn’t getting to do the things he wanted to do. Sexually, personally, whatever—he wasn’t really following his dreams. He was just in this relationship, and that’s the way it was. Well, we talked for a number of months in my chat room, and he picked up and decided to leave his partner. He moved out here from the Midwest, checked into going to school. He’s now doing the things he’s always wanted to do for himself. I didn’t tell him to leave his partner. I just spoke to him from my experience. That was rewarding. He’s happy now.
You were telling me earlier about how difficult it is for you to go out to predominantly gay areas, because you’re so recognizable.
Yeah. [Sighs] My partner and I went to the White Party last year for my birthday, and after a while we realized that there was an empty circle around us, in a crowd of hundreds of men. And they were all staring at us. No one said anything to me. They just stared. We had to leave. I felt like a freak.
Do you find people have certain expectations they demand of you?
[He gazes at me directly for several moments.] Yes.
How do you handle that?
I don’t know, really. I’m just me. I have this man-boy thing going on, you know? I’m not one thing or another. I can be whatever you want me to be.
People can project onto you anything they want.
Exactly. [Sighs] It can be rough living up to the expectations of strangers. It can tear you apart. But I listen to my fans. I talk to them. They tell me what they want to see, and I don’t want to be pegged as one thing or another. I’m an exclusive with Raging Stallion now, and they have me set for a couple of new films, including a light fetish movie. I think the crowd for that kind of movie is more my kind of crowd anyway, the nasty older guys.
What’s next for you?
More of the same! [Laughs] I don’t know, man. To keep growing. I want to move back up to Northern California and transition out of the business at some point. I’m doing landscaping work, on top of everything else, just to keep my hands in the dirt. I’m learning to keep it all balanced.
Text by Benjamin Scuglia
See Dean Coulter in all his full frontal glory in the latest issue of Unzipped Monthly, on sale now.
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